The theme for a recent Come, Follow Me lesson comes from 2 Nephi 5:27 “And it came to pass that we lived after the manner of happiness.” The leading paragraphs in the manual says that Nephi and his people “also learned that happiness does not come easily or without periods of sorrow. It ultimately comes from trusting the Lord.”
No doubt countless people — I would say all humans, everywhere — have (or will) experienced great tragedy, loss, sorrow, sadness, grief, pain, and all sorts of trials and afflictions. In fact, if each person were to write a story about their mortal experience on earth, many of the “things” that would be cataloged there would include painful, trying experiences. Each story might look different, but each would seem on the surface to have many negative, unhappy events — obviously some more than others, but trials are a central part of every human life. Even just the act of being born is one of effort and trial not only for the mother giving birth but for the child entering the world. If we look at life through this lens, it is easy to see how dark and dreary the world is. Then when we add all the sorrow and tragedy and loss of each person together as a whole human race, it is overwhelming and seems hopeless. Life. Is. Hard.
In The Book of Mormon we read multiple accounts of hardships and trials of the people who lived during that time. At a particular trying period of my life about 5 years ago, I had a lot of time on my hands doing dialysis and practically living at the hospital. As I read through the Book of Mormon, I highlighted any time I came across words such as affliction, trial, hardship, longsuffering, suffering, pain, sorrow, tribulation, misery, or any other word with similar context. What I found was interesting and lifted my spirits: nearly every time any of these words were used, the passage included or followed with words of faith or testimony of the Savior, Jesus Christ. For example, in the very first verse of 1 Nephi 1, Nephi says, “and having seen many afflictions in the course of my days, nevertheless, having been highly favored of the Lord in all my days; yea, having had a great knowledge of the goodness and the mysteries of God.” Nephi is essentially saying; my life has been very hard, but I have been very blessed because of the Lord.
To be honest, I started this post about a month ago, but life has brought me challenges of my own. I have not felt well most of the days, yet life moves forward and I had to keep going. The one thing I could “drop” was blogging. I missed it. I couldn’t believe how much I appreciate getting my thoughts out, knowing few people will ever read them. I’ve said before that this blog is rather selfish in that way because I can write what I think and feel in hopes of sharing my experiences and testimony with my family. But in the last month in addition to continuing health challenges, I had a daughter getting ready for baptism. She turned eight at the end of February and with that came parties and celebrations and baptism preparations. It was physically taxing and spiritually exhausting, but also so rewarding. What a joyful month it has been and I have felt an abundance of the Spirit of the Lord.
Speaking of challenges and living after the manner of happiness, let me share a quick story. Preface: Both of my daughters decided on their own that they wanted to read the entire Book of Mormon before turning eight and getting baptized. My elder daughter, Evanie, was so sweet, saying, “I think it is important to know whether the Book of Mormon is true and the Church is true before I get baptized, don’t you, Mom?” So, as a family, we read and finished The Book of Mormon three years ago when Evanie was baptized. We started last year to read it with Dottie, my recently-turned-eight-year-old. We were just finishing Helaman around Christmastime. My family decided to start over with Come, Follow Me this year, but Dottie insisted she wanted to finish it before her birthday and that I could do it with her. In addition to my own personal study and our family study, I began a “buddy study” with Dottie. It usually turned into a bedtime story type thing where we would read one verse each or I would read to her, one or two chapters a day. It was extra work for me, but I also look back with joy on the experience.
Okay, now for the story: I don’t know what it is (but it happened with my older daughter as well), but it seems that right before kids turn eight and decide to get baptized, they test limits and boundaries more than usual. I could ask my daughter to clean her room and I’m met with weeping and whaling more so than usual. Or when she needs to brush her teeth or even her hair, moaning and murmuring ensues. There was one particular day when my husband was at work and I was home with the kids getting chores done, etc. My soon-to-be eight-year-old, Dottie, was not having it. She fought with her sister, she argued with me, no matter what I said or did, she was not changing her attitude. I felt overwhelmed and frustrated. I remember going to my room and praying to the Lord, asking Him for help. I said something to the effect of, “She is your child and I do love her, but I cannot do this. I need help.” I recall clearly the immediate answer of overwhelming love and comfort and the words that came to my mind: “I do love Dottie. And I love you. You are both mine. Go and ask Dottie if she wants to read The Book of Mormon with you.” Okay, not going to lie, I thought, yeah, right. That is the last thing she is going to want to do right now. She’s been so ornery. But I was desperate, and I knew I had felt the Spirit, so I went and asked her, “Dottie, do you want to stop what we’re doing and read The Book of Mormon together now?” She turned and looked at me, a complete change in her countenance. She was smiling and her eyes were excited. She said, “Mom! That is exactly what we need to do!” I felt the love of the Lord in that moment. I knew that Jesus Christ knew me and my sweet Dottie. He knew the frustration I felt. He felt it with me. But He also knew Dottie’s heart and her own frustrations. He allowed me to know that what we both needed was the amazing Spirit that comes from reading The Book of Mormon. The entire day changed. Both Dottie and I changed. We got all our chores and other tasks done before my husband got home, and I was blessed with the physical strength to do it.
I think of all the challenges and trials in the world (and even in my own life at the time with the health challenges I’ve had), and this incident with Dottie was not a great challenge on the surface. It wasn’t building a ship or having brothers trying to kill me or my father like Nephi. Still, in that moment on that day it was a very real and troublesome problem I faced. And Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ still gave me the answer and strength I needed to fulfill my role as a mom. FYI, she did finish The Book of Mormon and she did get baptized. The Spirit was so strong at her baptism — I’ve not felt it that powerful at another baptism before, which was just another witness to me of how much Heavenly Father loves her and how much she loves Him.
I could write endlessly about more trials, great and small, and I’m sure that each of you could share your own experiences for days. The message is still the same: Jesus is mindful of us. He is aware of all that matters to us. And even the small things matter to Him because it matters to us. He knows personally what it feels like to go through all things, great and small. It is because of this truth that I find hope in the hymn “Come, Ye Disconsolate” — the words are so promising. I have heard the lyrics quoted recently in General Conference and in other places. I am looking forward to hearing the new Gentri arrangement of the hymn on their new album. Rob Gardner’s arrangement is one of my favorites. But, it is also in the Hymnbook. Wherever you find it, I hope it brings you peace like it does for me.
Here are the lyrics:
Come, ye disconsolate, where’er ye languish;
Come to the mercy seat, fervently kneel.
Here bring your wounded hearts; here tell your anguish.
Earth has no sorrow that heav’n cannot heal.
Joy of the desolate, Light of the straying,
Hope of the penitent, fadeless and pure!
Here speaks the Comforter, tenderly saying,
“Earth has no sorrow that heav’n cannot cure.”
Here see the Bread of Life; see waters flowing
Forth from the throne of God, pure from above.
Come to the feast of love; come, ever knowing
Earth has no sorrow but heav’n can remove.
I love these lyrics and the hope they provide. My favorite line is the last in each stanza, slightly varied by verse. Earth has no sorrow that heaven cannot heal, cure, or remove. It reminds me that all trials and tribulations and afflictions of this life are temporary. If we trust in Jesus Christ and stay true to our covenants with Him, our suffering will have an end. I know it can be discomforting at times to know we must endure the trials of this life often until the end of our mortality, which gives little relief on the surface in the midst of trial. However, I also know that keeping an eternal perspective and recognizing these trials can bring us closer to the Lord and help us to become like Him can bring us peace and joy and happiness in ways we never could have experienced otherwise.
I choose to continue to look for the ways the Lord has blessed me in my afflictions, even on days it seems too difficult to bear. Alone it would be too difficult, but I am not alone. We are not alone. Jesus Christ is our Companion. Through keeping covenants, we can feel His Spirit ALWAYS. Always. It is my prayer that we do even on our darkest days and can say with Nephi that “we live after the manner of happiness.”
